Thursday, December 9, 2010

Thursday 3's

Hey everyone!



Trials:
Schedule...still.
NaNo's done and I feel the resolve for 4:45 mornings dwindling by the quarter hour marks on my alarm clock. 

Thoughts:
December is so full of mystery to me.  Not just the Christmas gift thing, that's all fun and stuff, but the new things we learn each year about Christ, the way our children react and act about the holidays, the anticipation of the weeks off of AWANA...(come on, I know I'm not alone in THAT one!)  But most of all, the disheveling of work/play/shopping priorities has really thrown me for a loop this year. 
I want to spend, spend, spend for some odd reason.  Last year we only spent about 150$ on Christmas (all gifts and decorations), but this year, I'm going haywire!  We've spend at least 500 and we're not done yet!!!!
Maybe we're making up for last year ;)
Things feel so out-of-sorts starting with Thanksgiving week and on into the new year when things start to settle down into a new year of routines.

Triumphs:
IT'S OUR FOUR YEAR ANNIVERSARY TODAY!!!!!
Yay!
Four years ago, I married the man of my dreams.  My spiritual leader, the father of my kids, the cook in our house, the man I go to for counsel...God wound us together as one that day...and I'll never forget how happy I was.  Nor will I ever think a wedding was more perfect or suited for the couple than ours was.  Each time we go to another wedding, we lean in at some point to each other and admit that ours was waaaay better :)

Tuesday, December 7, 2010

So tell me....

I had no idea what I was going to do this morning...so instead, I'm writing it tonight, and it's going to be seen on Wednesday instead of Tuesday. 
I have a few questions for you to answer...they will be interesting answers, they always are, but these I felt really made me remember why I write and want to share it with the world.

I'll answer the questions, but then it's your turn.  Leave a comment telling me your answers.


1. What do you write? (YA, Women's Fiction...)
2. What is your message?
3. What does writing do for your relationship with God?
4. What does writing do for your relationship with your family?
5. What does writing do for you?


Okay, here's the answers from moi:

1. At the moment, I'm writing Women's Fiction/speculative
2. Wow, this is harder than a synopsis...
Hope, even after an abortion, God still forgives, he LOVES and heals people of their pain.
3. Writing puts me in a mode of worship (when I let it).
4. My family will attest to the fact that my attitude changes for the better when I write.  I get thoughts out in my devotion, and my creativity isn't just scrambled around inside, it's channeled.
5. Writing for me personally, lets me get my ideas out.  It makes my mind clearer and ready for the "next thing".

Now...
shoot. 
You're turn.

Tuesday, November 30, 2010

Through God ALL Things...

Are Possible!
Lord knows I didn't think it could happen, but it has! 
50,000 words in a month! 
To all the NaNo's out there, GREAT job!  This took a lot of sacrifice, hard work, and a lot of toil in fighting that inner critic. 

My inner critic was a brat! 
I showed her, though!
I did the prologue in third person and without thinking twice, switched to first on chapter one!
Here's the best part...it's STILL sitting like that in my computer.  (teehehe)

I found myself looking forward to spending time with my characters, and with God writing without care of what was left in the wake.
I finally just threw a story down like the first layer of primer to the painter.
I'm NOT so excited to go back and tweak, respell...okay, BUTCHER the thing, but hey, you can't edit a blank page!

I LOVED this push.
I needed that one.
Here is the rundown of how I was working on before NaNo (which I plan on fully continuing this story in the morning, just a lot differently now that I can do it)
-I did three first drafts of the thing.
-I plotted (slowly, detailed) for a full month and worked out all the bugs (not finished plotting, though!  Only about 1/3rd of the way through)
-Still looking at part of the draft and not happy with it. 
-Going to work on that tomorrow. 

Here's the rundown of how I did the NaNo book.
-Plotted for 2 days
-Wrote for 30
-To edit when I finish previous WIP  (4th) first draft.

The good news?
All those stories that are flying in my head are going to get put down a lot more quickly now that I know I can do it.
Here's to November, and December and January, and Feb...

Juggle I must...

How did your NaNo go?
Have you ever done it?
What did you learn from it?
Will you do it again?



Tuesday, November 23, 2010

Tossing Out the Clock

 
photo: granbypdblog.org

Each morning I get up at 4:45am to do a devotion and pray, then I get right to work at 5am.  I type away with, as NaNoWriMo so elliquently puts it, literary abandon.  My deadline to get up is 6am.  I sort of watch the clock as I type, type, type away, but I am always amazed by how quickly the time flies.  5:03...5:17...5:38...5:.....6?!  Wha...but...I....UGH!!!! FINE....

Most days, when I really get in the zone and I'm flying by with 1500 w/hour, I'm saddened by the time restraint.  "I've just begun!  I'm just now really getting into it!"  If I were a child, I'd fall to the ground, whine, cry and want to get my way...but I'm not a child (at least that's what I've been told), so I close my laptop and get things going for the long day ahead, and anxiously anticipate the next morning.

However, when Thanksgiving morning comes I'm getting on that computer and going into FULL literary abandon mode!!  I'm so excited to bring my charging cord with me to the living room! :)  I can't wait to see how many words I can get in. 

(I'll certainly keep you posted.  My current wc is 34,000 or so...eeek!  I'm so nervous!  We don't have very many days left in November!!!  But considering the only amount I thought I'd reach was 30,000, I've already exeded my personal goal :)

Now, here's my laundry list of random questions:

-Do you watch the clock?
-What is your normal daily word count/hour? (or however you measure it)
-What are your writing Thanksgiving day-off plans? 
-Are you going to push writing aside and go for the extra z's?


Happy Thanksgiving, Family!

Thursday, November 11, 2010

Thursday Thoughts

Okay, in an attempt to liven up this blog, I'm going to try a few new things.
The first in line this week is a version of Katie Ganshert's 3C's Friday...only it's Thrusdays and with different words that start with a different letter.
I've decided, I do believe, that I'm going to post Tuesdays and Thursdays.
So, Here's the first go-at-it.

Three T's Thursday

Trials:
NaNo.  Need I say more? lol

Triumphs:
Norman is getting better.  That's somewhat part of the reason I've been in and out of blogger.  I've been taking care of the kids and the house alone while Norman gets better, leaving little time for posting :( I've missed you guys, but THANKFULLY, Norman is getting over his bug and cold stuff.
Keep praying that me and the boys don't get it, though.

Thoughts:
I'm so thankful for what NaNo's been doing for me.  I get up at 4:45 and do my devotion/pray.  Then I get to my computer promptly (or not) at 5am and write till 6am.  My goal each day is (what NaNo suggests) 1667wds/day.  I go up and down on it.  Sometimes I'll have 1400 sometimes I'll have 1800...but in the end it works out.
Now, this has pushed me SOOOO far along in the novel writing process that it amazes me.  I'm already on chapter 19 of my first draft!!!!  I never thought it could be done...but all it takes is a plan!

I'm really proud of what this has done for my confidence in actually "doing the dirty work" of writing.  I'm able to push past the blank page, Lord willing, and write!  To do what I was meant to do, and to do it quickly.  To get the words down is a big deal...then I can butcher it into a really good manuscript...over and over and over again till it shines.  BUT NaNo is helping me see how far I can really take myself.

Now, your turn!

Friday, November 5, 2010

Which Is Your Style?

I've seen bloggers blog everyday, some blog three times a day, and others, myself included blog when inspiration strikes.

How do you blog?

What's your schedule?
Do you pre-plan them and set them in que?
Do you feel the urge and blog away?
Do you plan and wrack your brain as you stare at the blank post form?

Which is your style?

Friday, October 22, 2010

NaNoWriMo

Okay, it's official!

I'm one crazy lunatic...for those of you who already knew that, keep your mouths shut, k?

I signed up for NaNo this coming month...and I'm petrified!
I don't have enough time to consistently write 1000 words each day...how am I going to write 50k in a MONTH?!!!!!!

*sigh*

30k's closer than 0, right?

Who else is doing this stupid thing we call NaNoWriMo?

Tuesday, October 19, 2010

Red Ink - Review

I was recently given the privelage of reading Kathi Macias's Red Ink, the third novel in the Extreme Devotion Series.
1. No Greater Love
2. More Than Conquerors
3. Red Ink
4. People of the Book


 
On the Back:
Zhen-Li-Raised to observe the party line, including it's one-child-per-family policy- falls in love, marries a Christian, and adopts his faith.  Though the couple downplays their Christianity in an effort to survive, Zhen-Li's family is appalled, and she and her husband are ostracized.  When she becomes pregnant for the second time and refuses to have an abortion, the persecution begins in earnest.  Zhen-Li's parents, under pressure form the government, pay to have Zhen-Li kidnapped and the baby aborted.
It is then that Zhen-Li  decides she must live up to her name- "Truth" -and take a firm stand for her faith, reguardless of the consequences, and so she beings to regularly teach children about Zhu Yesu (Lord Jesus) and to distribute Christian literature every chance she gets.
Based loosely on the life of Christian magazine editor Li Ying, currently serving a ten-year prison sentance in China, the story of Yang




At first, I found this book hard to read.  Not becuase of the writing, not becuase of the names and Chinese language sprinkled, (I actually quite enjoyed that, and now find myself saying Zhu Yesu instead of what I usually say for Lord Jesus) but because I hate to see this persecution as truth.
You hear about the persecution in other countries, but until you read about it or see it, those stories are well...just stories.
This novel took my heart and emotions and threw them in the face of reality, and I loved it.

Zhen-Li is a young Chinese woman forced to serve a prison sentance for distributing unauthrized material to children. 

She befriends another young Chinese woman and finds it her mission to witness to her.

An American teenager gets into drugs and a bad relationship and is taken down a path of terror.

Two sweet, gentle, kind, loving Christian elders find THEIR mission in praying for, the granddaughter of a new resident and all that comes in contact with them and a woman in China (Zhen-Li).

Through this book, I learned a new way to see God.  Kathi Macias shows the reality of our God as presence a to be reckoned with if you're against Him, but a presence to depend...no really...DEPEND on when you're on His side.

Apart from the great story and honesty it showed me, this book takes on a different meaning for me personally.
I'm writing something that deals with hard issues like this, and to see this people of China and what they believe, I'm learning how to write better (even though you can't tell by my grammar) what God is trying to get me to see.



Check out Kathi Macias here.

Thursday, October 7, 2010

Did He Really Love Me?

I was listening to Way FM one morning and heard Brant pose a question about God loving us now that we're His children, but does He hate us when we sin?
It was (okay, I'm paraphrasing here) mentioned by one of the people, not quite sure who it was that He loves us now that we're his children and doesn't hate us when we sin.

But a peace settled across my soul becuase God doesn't hate us, he hates our sin.  But even though God hates sin, He doesn't leave us lying in our own dirty pit of it.  He shows us, repremands us, and teaches us how to overcome it!  WE ARE VICTORIOUS!!!

I think a lot of people, myself included feel at one point or another that God judges us on how we act.  Did I pray today?  Did I ask God for help?  Will he still hear me even if I thought I could do this on my own?  Will he be mad or do something bad to me if I don't go to church?  That is, thankfully, not our place with God.

In the begining, we were at emnity with God.  But HE STILL LOVED US THEN!!!!
How do we know this?

For God so LOVED the world that he sent his only son that whosoever believes in him woudln't perish but have everlasting life.

God loves us, how are we to really KNOW he loves us?

My husband was teaching our youth last night in AWANA and one of the teenagers asked if once we're saved, can we get lost again?
VERY important, VERY pertinant question.

So can we?

NO!

Praise God, if his Jesus wasn't sufficient enough to keep me, then he would have had another kid and sent him too.  That's how much God loves us.
But Jesus was sufficient becuase, okay, first of all he IS God.  Part of the Trinity.
He came as God in the flesh and died for our sins.

God hates sin.  We all know that, otherwise, he wouldn't have told us not to sin.  But He does NOT hate us.  All Scripture, all the times I've personally felt God with me, near me, loving me, healing me, teaching me, and walking with me PROVES that He loved us in the begining becuase until about 5 years or so ago, I wasn't saved.  But I still felt God with me.

A child in the midst of tragedy or danger can sense God protecting them, or even being present with them and so can we.  Now, I know Jesus loves children.  He was a male who actually gave children the time of day back then.  He gave women the time of day...even the ones he was forbidden to talk to!  He LOVES US!!!!

He upended religeon of his day to SHOW us this.

God sent his Son and the Holy Spirit, to show us he loves us.  In John 1:1-2 and 14 he Bible says:  1In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God. 2He was with God in the beginning.  14The Word became flesh and made his dwelling among us. We have seen his glory, the glory of the One and Only,[d] who came from the Father, full of grace and truth. 




"You light up the sky, you light up the sky to show me you are with me!  I can't deny, no I can't deny that you are RIGHT HERE WITH ME! You opened my eyes, so I can see you all around me, you light up the sky, you light up the sky to show me....that you are with me..." - The Afters (Again, paraphrasing :)

I want whomever is reading this to know that God doesn't hate you.
He loves you.
Sinner, lift up your head!
Love is passing by!

By the grace of God, I am His.
Not by what I have done, but by what God has done.

~~~~



Alright, family, if I have missinterpreted things here, please point them out.
Unfortunately, when I was trying to get ahold of the radio station to talk to them about this, all I could hear was a bunch of static.  :(  So I hung up the phone.

Tuesday, September 28, 2010

This or That

Third Person or First Person
And which variation? 

Thursday, September 23, 2010

Where the Rubber Meets the Road

Or in a writer's case...where the fingers meet the keys.

I've been plotting, character journaling, and outlining my latest WIP.

It's going great.
My petulant character I ranted about here finally opened up a little and shared with me what his thought processes were.

However, it's been about a month since I started organizing and outlining this work in progress, and I finally feel as though it's time to start writing.

How do we know when that time comes?
When is it time to get down 'n dirty?

1.  When things are making sense
I've been trying to organize this book for a long time, but now, after much agonizing and fretting with my Critique Partner and with God I feel as though I know where this thing should go.  I've got the jist of the thing.

2.  When you feel the need to just WRITE!
Okay, let's face it.  We're writers.  We've got to do it or things just aren't right.  I've noticed a significant difference in the way I feel and react to my family and friends when I AM writing and when I'm NOT writing.  It's night and day.  So when we feel the itch, it's nothing to write a few chapters even if we're going to scrap them later.  Just write!

3.  When you're at that deadline.
As an aspiring author, I have to set my own goals and deadlines.  I don't have an agent tapping his/her foot and rolling eyes at me (this in no way reflects how I feel about agents.  I know they are here to do what's best for us and our work).   Our goals in reality are probably cake compared to an agent's requests.  But in order to get anything done in the unpubbed world, we HAVE TO SET GOALS.  Otherwise, we'll be floating for a long, long time.  It's healthy to have goals.  It keeps us moving. (okay, rant over.)  Make them attainable, but make them to push yourself.

4.  When you feel led by God
I've been waiting for God to come and lead me through my characters when I character journal with them.  I've asked Him to lead me when I'm just opening my notebook to show me what He would have me write, and He does!  I know without a doubt that this is God's story.  It's a worship time, and we're connected.  (See one of my post about this here)  So it's obvious He's going to give us a prompt in the right direction. 
Take those prompts and follow Him.  He's got a plan for all things.  That includes our future, and that includes our work.

These are the four factors that have finally pushed me to the point of action.

Question:  What are your "go ahead" signals?  How do you know when it's right to write?

Wednesday, September 22, 2010

This Or That:

Is your story character driven or plot driven?

Thursday, September 16, 2010

Joy vs Happiness

I was listening to Jill Briscoe, an Ah-HA!-MAAAAZING teacher and speaker.
If you've never heard her, you NEED to!
Telling the Truth is her family's ministry.
She is the person that prayed and spoke at the Just Give Me Jesus! event.


She was talking about joy vs. happines.

Happiness is fleeting.
Happiness you find in finishing a task; from the rain and a good cup'a joe; from a silly movie you've been dying to see, but joy...
Joy is much different.

I learned WHY I feel so wonderful when I write.
Why I feel as though it's what I'm called to do.

Becuase it brings me joy.
And it makes me happy but the point is:

Her definition of joy is when God smiles.

When I'm writing and we're communing, THAT is making God smile.
Therefore, THAT brings me joy.

We are made to bring praise to God.
When we do what we are meant to do, it brings God joy...for me, that's writing.
I can feel Him smile over me.  When I ask Him to come with me and work through me, that gives God joy.

What about you?
What do you do that gives God joy?

 Find Jill Brisco's work here and here.
The two on Spirit Life for 9/14/2010 and 9/13/2010 are what you're looking for, although every one of them packs a power punch of love and learning.

Tuesday, September 14, 2010

This or That

To read:
Fiction/Non Fiction

To write:
Fiction/Non Fiction

Thursday, September 9, 2010

My Petulant Character...The Man

It has been suggested that I try character journaling.
I ask my characters a question and answer it in first person, their pov.

I LOVE it.

Getting to know our characters takes time and patience.
At the moment, my main man :) is being a little petulant in my opinion.

He's not really telling me what is going on in his head.

I've prayed that the Lord be by my side and point out how to iron out their personalities, inconsistencies, goals and such, and we've come a long way, but this guy...I don't know what to do with him.

He's a man of power who's cheated on my MC...HOW does a guy think, first of all, and second, how does a guy like THAT think?

It's all sort of comical, really.
I'm sitting in my chair, blanket covering me, pen and paper in hand, question laid before me:
Q: What made you do it?  Why did you cheat?
A:



Still blank.
Ha.
Funny.  I know exactly how I would portray him, given the reins on this beast!  I'd make him a JERK!
But it doesn't seem to work out like that.  The answer line is stiiiiiiiill blank.  God's holding my pen when I get angry at this fictional man.

Did he want attention he wasn't getting from his busy wife?  And his new blonde secretary in his outter office enticing him, her soft blone hair curling just under her strong, stubborn jaw line; her painfully vast, knowing hazel eyes; she sees through him.  She knows how he feels.  She's seen his shaking hands as he reaches for the daily reports.  She's witnessed him on the phone glance her way as her hazels drag his attention away from Madame President. 

But did he JUST want attention?
What did he want?
What do you think?
What does this jerk want? lol, I'm good a'mind just to make him hated. 
But, he can't be hated.  My MC still loves him, finds Christ and loves him even more although she's hurt, and yes, they get back together -sorry, but this won't be out soon, and by the time you actually read it, you'll have completely forgotten about his post-I'm not spoiling =D

She loves him, the reader has to love him....but if he starts out so...hated, even by me, how in the WORLD will I get him back into our good graces again?

How do you deal with stubborn-willed, unrelenting characters?
How do YOU break through that wall they build so high?

Tuesday, September 7, 2010

Tuesday, August 31, 2010

Disappointment

When we hear news that breaks our hearts, where do we turn?

Sunday night, I wanted to turn to anger.
What would that have solved?

Nothing, in fact, it would have created many more problems, like a law suit for starters.

However, now that I'm in a position of authrity, I had to seriously reconsider my feelings.

I began to realize, this person is no different than me.
I was once in their shoes.

What right do I have to judge?
I've been forgiven of each and every sin in my past, they can be too.
Especially by me who should understand more than anyone.

So I turned to love.  Not my love, but Christ's love.

How did the people I disappoint feel so many years ago when I wound up in those same shoes?
Probably the same as I do now.
But they too showed me love.

I was so at home with my church family, after feeling their love and acceptance, I was able to move on.
However, at the slightest judgement, I wanted to run.  Far and fast.

But they didn't judge me.  They loved me.

When someone disappoints us, our first reaction may be to get angry, it may be to take them by the shoulders and pin them against the wall and say, "Look at me!! Look at where I was!   DO NOT GO THERE!!!!"
But by the love and compassion we've been shown by the One who created us, we realize we are, by the grace of that Creator, not in the same shoes, and thus, the love overflows...
and in some ways, when the love overflows, the feelings of pain and hurt become worse.

We're vulnerable again.

Once we've been burned, we want to close it off, and then what happens when we open up again?
Disappointment.


But then I looked at their life.
It's falling apart.
They're grasping at whever makes sense right now.
And right now...
it's what could really hurt them.

I ache for them right now.
But I'm just a leader in their church.
I'm not the parent...and if I was, you'd bet they'd be pinned...

But I'm not.
I've still got my little boys to think about.
I've still got my family who needs me to be all I can be and not dwell on this.

So now I can only hope.

WHAT?!!!
THATS IT??!!!!

THATS ALL I GOT?!

Surely with the relationship we've had, with the authority I've got....

No.
That's it.

BULL!!!!

Sorry, Kel.  Nothing you can do.


YOU'RE WRONG!

Sorry.

I'm going to DO something.
I'm going to be on my FACE for her...and ask God what to TALK about with her...
SHE. CAN. SILL. BE. RESCUED.

I DONT BELIEVE YOU.
THIS STUPID POLICITALLY CORRECT VOICE IN MY HEAD...
I'm going to do all I can for the people I love...and she's one of them.

Q4u:
In a situation that involved someone else...did you do what you could or did you look away?

Thursday, August 19, 2010

Prayer Requests

Last night at church, I sat and listened to all the requests we had from our small group of believers.
There were SO many!

We live in such a broken world!  A child of 3 has leukemia, her 6 year old sister is scared to death.  A really sweet lady is in the hospital...  The list could go on...for HOURS!  There are so many things to be praying for!

But I wonder:
As desperate as we are for God to heal and fix...what are you THANKFUL for?

Friday, August 13, 2010

God's Workmanship

“For we are God's workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.”- Ephesians 2:10 (biblegateway.com daily bible verse)


I've said before that I'm afraid of writing this WIP.  I'm not now!

I may feel that way again, but I know what verse to look up!

What about you?
What is your "get-up-and-go-give-me-gumption" push right now?

Tuesday, August 10, 2010

Welcome Back

I'm so happy to be back here :)

I missed reading everyone's blogs, posting my own, and especially commenting on other's posts and communicating.

The two weeks of too-busy are oh-oh over.  We had a great time in VBS and one young girl got saved and ONE OF THE YOUTH GOT SAVED!!!!

We just went to his baptism (at the river-okay, that was cool) on Sunday!
I'm so proud of him!
God is GOOD!

*sigh*


Softball is aaaaalmost over, please be praying for our safety in the tournament starting Thursday.

So, family, how was your two weeks?
What have I missed?
What's going on in your lives?
It's going to take me a looooong time to catch up on blog posts :( 
So expect some late-coming comments =D

*hugs*

http://critiquethiswip.blogspot.com/2010/08/tuesday-tag-by-kelly-freestone_10.html

I posted a fun, creative writing post on Critique This.  Please check it out.

Tuesday, July 27, 2010

A Time of Silence

I've read several good posts today about the waiting and listening process we writers must encounter in order to have conflicts solved, spend time with our Savior and learn about ourselves.

I have lately been writing in the early hours of the day.

Well, this week, we're doing VBS from 6-9pm. which means we get back to our house at about 10pm.  No baths for the kids or nighttime routines have been done by 10 PM!!!!

Yesterday morning, I prayed as usual to receive guidance from God on what to write and where to take my story, but when I sat down to the computer, half-blank screen staring at me, blinking cursor mocking me, I just sat there, and did nothing.

I had 30 minutes alone in front of that computer, and nothing came out.  I just stared at it, unable to do anything, blank.  Nothing. Zilch, Nada.

I could have been frustrated, but instead, I picked up my VBS book and studied my lesson.

I'm co-teaching the youth this year, which is where my heart is, but I don't usually teach, I'm not comfortable teaching that age group.  I suppose I'm used to teaching 3yr olds, and 3yr olds are so animated when they listen to stories, youth just kinda...stare at you.

However, despite recent crappy teaching sessions, where the only thing anyone ever learned was that I'm a terrible youth teacher, I taught a class yesterday...and LOVED it!

I was more animated with them, and held onto my thoughts, kept pushing toward the mark, and I know yesterday morning when I couldn't write a sinlge word on that computer, God was beckoning me toward that lesson.

The extra time I had preparing for it, and preparing MYSELF for it by focusing and BEING with God is what focused me on LETTING God teach that lesson through me.

I believe I'm entering a time of silence in my writing, at least for this week while VBS insues.  After this, I look forward to spending that 5am hour on writing...and I know God's gonna give it to me, cause when He wasn't there, N-O-T-H-I-N-G.

This time of Him not breathing through me shows me that He's really there when something is left on the screen after 60 minutes pass.

Please pray for our VBS this week, and pray that through us someone will see Christ.

What are your prayer requests for this week?

Thursday, July 22, 2010

Foreknowing

We all love our characters.
We wouldn't write about them if we didn't.

I love the one I'm working with now.
But I just recieved confirmation from God on how this little short speck of life will go that I'm capturing on the page.

It hurts me worse knowing what's to come.
It hurts knowing what the readers will have to feel as they read her story, cause they're going to feel exactly what I felt today as I cried, shaking my head, not wanting to do it (God will lead me).

And when they cry, so will I.

Now, stop for a moment.
Immerse yourself in your current issue right now.
God feels the same way about YOU!  God feels the same way about you!

He's been there.  He's already seen it.
He's gonna cry right along with you, just as He did with me (and does whenever I hurt).
He knows what you're going to feel.  He's felt it already in the foreknowing of what's to come.  He saw it on the screen, and He'll face it again when He sees it live ("...right by your siiiiiiiiiide..." -Mathew West).

As much as this stuff hurts, God knows exactly what you're going through.
He already knows you're suffering.  Take it to Him and lay it down at His feet so He can finally comfort you.

I kind of understand now.  I know that right now, in this moment of my life, I'm supposed to write what hurts so people can know it's real and that they can know where to go.

(excuse me while I rejoice in sorrow)

Hugs.

How about you?
Tell me what your purpose is right now, and what you feel God's leading you to do.

Tuesday, July 20, 2010

Book Club

Okay, I'm praying about joining the ACFW Book Club.

I love the Statement of Faith they have on their application.
It's 50.00 to join and 40.00 anually after that.
Not much considering all I'd get from them.

Friends, better conference pricing, classes, all that good...okay...GREAT stuff...but I only have so much monay I put into my writing envelope for writing expenses (per week).

Back at Christmas, I bought about ten books with a deal Christianbook.com had going.  I gave away two or three for my Secret Sister, and kept several for myself.  I'm still reading them, so I'm not going to purchase books anytime soon with this money, but...should I do this?

I feel like a book club is a big responsibility, one that I don't want to take lightly.

I've got the money reserved for writing expense...
I'm still seeking out God's wisdom
I believe He's given me you ladies/gents and our writerly connections for a reason, so I'm asking your opinions as well.

Q's4U:

What would you do, given the opportunity?
What have you done about it?
Are book clubs really worth the expense?
Do you find that you are growing due to the expense and responsibility?

Friday, July 16, 2010

Write This Way...

I. Love. Writing.
I love it.
As tired and as overwhelmed as it can get (you writers know what I mean), I love it.
Why else would we write...it's not an easy task, and the paycheck...?

However, I have a secret weapon...and no, it's not spell check.

My secret weapon is this:
I've got God.

My characters seem to speak to me, but I know Who it really is.  I have these ideas, but I know Who's they really are.  I have words on a blank screen, I know Where they're really from. 

They're not mine.
I've asked God to take this book, this incredible book that's been placed on my lap via a great, long time, trusted, loving caring, dear friend of mine. 
It's way bigger than me.  Way bigger.
I'm writing about hard stuff, and He's where I get my strength.

Each morning, before I sit down to write, I journal.  I ask God to lead my words, thoughts, phrases etc and mold it into what He'd have it to be (well, as far as first drafts are concerned)

I've been given a great critique partner.
We found each other in college, but now we're actually close, and I love her.  She's amazing.
God. Is. Working.

I have this idea that isn't mine, but I'm doing my best to make it God's, and He's answering back.
Each time there are words on my screen, I hear from Him.
My form of worship is writing.
I'm writing for me, and for God.  That's our time.
It's sacred, special, perfect. 
Okay, so not perfect, my other weapon is the backspace key...

But still, I know where the inspiration comes from, and I love tapping into that inspiration and finding how much God loves me through what He has me write.

The Bible may be the Greatest Love Letter ever written,
But my little notes from God are super special to me.

p.s. Sorry it's been so long, dear faithful followers, I love you mcuh.

How do you look at writing?
Is it worship?  Release?  Comfort?
What drives you in what you do?
Why do you love this so much?

Monday, July 12, 2010

Waiting Out the Storm, Ruth Logan Herne

I won this delightful little jewel from my friends at the Seekerville blog (this thing's acting screwey, I couldn't link their page.  Check them out on my blogroll to the right.)

On the back cover:
When family tragedy strikes, Sarah Slocum steps in as guardian to her two nieces and nephew.  But raising children isn't like raising sheep, and the beautiful shephard soon finds herself in over her head.  Who'd have guessed that new neighbor Craig Macklin would jump in to lend a hand? Craig's always held a grudge against Slocums-Sarah included.  Now the handsome local vet is helping with her livestock, giving her young nephew a job and smiling at her every chance he gets.  Sarah must decide whether she can trust Craig-and God's plan-and allow him into her family.

Sarah Slocum is a Native American spitfire!
I loved her from the begining, and to tell you the truth, I learned something from her.  It's that thing you always heard, but finally witnessed someone actually do, and that's "You can choose how you react"

Sarah's brother and father treated her like...crap, and she didn't react to them, further spuring them to be more hurtful, but they had their games, and caused lasting pain that she buried far below the surface..  However, she finally lets the self-pity and painfull words creep back to the surface, causing her to deal with the demons of the past after an accident leaves her face bruised and broken.
It causes her to question the beauty she felt she barely had in the first place, and led her to believe her brothers and step father were right.

This reminded me of most of the women I've talked to (and myself) on our self-confidence level and issues.  Watching this beautiful, strong, resiliant woman suffer these same issues and work through them really showed me that we don't have to listen to those voices we as women (and writers) have that tell us we're no good, we just have to believe God's plan, and be thankful for what He has blessed us with.


Having to deal with self-confidence issues she's worked so hard to hide, this stubborn, amazing, colorful woman heals with God's love and finally lets herself fall IN love with Craig Macklin. 

Craig is the usual jerk in the begining, but then again, his work with animals creates a soft spot, and Ruthy grows that soft spot and changes him to be the man Sarah needs. 
I love how Ruthy took this guy and transformed his thinking, first of all about this woman, and second about God. 

I just KNEW this would be a good read!  Turns out I was right!  Ruthy, girl...you did a GREAT job!  I'm looking forward to the other North Country novels!  Well done, Ruthy, well done.  (And thanks for the note, I keep telling myself not to quit, this made me smile :D)

Tuesday, July 6, 2010

Get Out of Bed!

I groaned, the stupid alarm clock again...how dare it mess with my dreams?!  The sun wasn't even up yet!  Why should I be up?!
Oh yeah, cause this is the time I set up to be my devotion/writing time...*sigh* It's just not right to have to get up this early...

I'm looking in the thin spaces of time I have during the day and trying to figure out when is a better time for me to write.
I hate getting up early lately, and I just can't seem to get enough snuggles with my children, making my get-ready time a little pushed back, and sometimes, undone...eek.

So, I'm calling all my writer friends...what are your schedules?  I've heard lots of you say you just write when you can...well, that gets me three months down the road, nothing written, so I need a schedule...what do you suggest?

Here's a normal day:
5am write
6am get ready
6:30 am get kids ready
7:00am leave for school and work
6pm get kids from school
6:30 pm home
7:00pm not really sure what we do here...I'll be looking closer at this time, but if I pick up my computer, my youngest starts crawling on me and whining to be held...they need mommy time at the end of a long day, and to be honest, I need children time, too.
we're eating by 8:00ish and in bed by 9:30ish.

Not a really scheduled time at the end of work...need to work on that one.
I'm sure if I had everything scheduled after work, it would be easier to find writing time at the end of the day...what are your schedules?

Tuesday, June 29, 2010

Strength For Today


May our stomaches be easily filled,
May our hearts be eager to love,
May our bellies be quick to laugh,
May our hands be busy with God's work.

Lord, fill us with Your Word
Fill our hearts with Your love
Fill our bellies with Your laughter
Fill our days with Your purpose.

“The LORD will fulfill his purpose for me; your love, O LORD, endures forever— do not abandon the works of your hands.”- Psalm 138:8 (today's daily bible verse, biblegateway.com)


His hands crafted me inside my mother's womb.
He has created a gift in me that I WILL use for His purpose.
I can't be held down by silly lies by the Father of Lies.
I refuse to believe when he tells me I'm not good enough.
So what if I'm not, God has given me the ability to learn, and He'll teach me the right way, and will love me through any snags along the way.

Lord, give me strength to continue in what I do not know, help me to move past the pain of learning about this world that so easily set you aside.  Stay close beside me as I walk through the darkness of selfish men and decisions.
Be the Light on my path.

Help these people reading this post know You love them with an everlasting love and will fight with them and for them.  You are not a god waiting for us to mess up, judging our faults and failures.
You are a God who is with us on the battlefield, standing beside us, in us, and for us.  You are the God who suffers with your children when they lose a parent, go through tragedy, or other hardships this broken world offers.  You are the One who is always praying for us...

"26In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groans that words cannot express. 27And he who searches our hearts knows the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for the saints in accordance with God's will." Romans 8:26-27
(read the post on this verse HERE)

Remind us why we do what we do.
 

I love you, blogsphere friends.
Thank you SO much for the encouragement you've given me over the last few weeks.
I hope you receive a little of the encouragement you've shown to others and myself.
Have a GREAT day, family!
Much love!

Thursday, June 24, 2010

Write What Hurts

Lately, I've been finding it hard to move past the simple daily tasks:
Brush teeth,
Get kids ready
Work for 10 hours
Get kids home
Softball?
Church?
Bed
Do it again the next day.

But, thank God I'm a Christian, I don't know how the other half of the population survives w/o Christ in their hearts.
I have to confess this:
One morning, I awoke to my dastardly alarm clock.  I shut if off, quite forcefully, and went back to bed.
That's not the bad part...that's the mild part.
I HEARD my Savior calling to me. I literally HEARD Him.
What happened?
I was already lost in sleep.
Yeah...ouch.
Can you imagine the special time we could have had?!


But what did He offer when I woke up alert at six, saddened by my mistake?
Joy.
Yes.  That Joy Unspeakable.
I love my Savior.  If you don't know Him, ask me, but what a JOY!
..."They will soar on wings like eagles"
I was happy to read that.
Despite the energy sapping days I have, I can STILL have joy.
Amazing.
Purely Amazing.

..."but those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.

Isaiah 40:30-31

As a runner, I GET the not grow weary part, walk and not faint...if you're in Florida, you'd better have a gallon o' wata waiting at the end of your run!

...but those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength...
I just can't get over it.
Praise God He's so...Complete.
I've got joy again.
It's hard to hang on to it...but I just keep repeating those words over and over and over again.  I CAN hope.  I have all the tools I NEED to hope.  the LORD will renew my strength.  Not just sleep, not circumstances, not excitement for things on earth...only God can do it *write* :D

Now, on to the day's post...lol.  It's not long, I promise.  We done had church, so not much more can be said! lol

Not in a million years did I think I could write so passionately again.
I love it.
However, I've been afraid of my work in progress.
Why?
Becuase it's a scary subject.
One that has been battled for years.
In a nutshell, it's about abortion, and in some smaller light, government.

How do you find the courage to write what hurts?

Note:
Check these out.  They're great posts!

http://emergingnotemergency.blogspot.com/
http://cba-ramblings.blogspot.com/2010/06/risky-gift.html
http://seekerville.blogspot.com/2010/06/courage.html

Thursday, June 17, 2010

My 5 Year Old

Hey again!
I can't believe this, but my baby is graduating from Pre-K!
It won't be but a blink, and he'll graduate kindergarten, aaaaand then high school!
(:o(
So, Question:
What's made you realize that life passes by WAAAY too fast?
Share your experiences :)


Thanks for reading.

Tuesday, June 15, 2010

Crossing Oceans by Gina Holmes (Review)

Crossing Oceans by Gina Holmes
was a heart-wrenching story of a mother with cancer.  In it, Genevive "Jenny" Lucas moves back to her hometown to get her affairs in order.

In the final stages of cancer, Jenny strives to reconcile with her father, set order to her daughter's future and come to grips with her fate.
She does, very gracefully.

Gina Holmes placed me into the worst of my fears.
As a mother of two boys, every line, every feeling, every thought process of this dying mother left me in tears.

She skillfully carried me along for this journey, and placed a holy fire under me to appreciate the life I have with my children and husband.
I've been showing this book to my friends and begging them to experience it. 

Even the cover suggests the mother is holding secrets, and it's heartbreaking to see her innocent child playing in the sand, her world about to crumble.  And that's exactly what happened.  Their world crumbled to pieces, and I watched helplessly through a book-shaped screen.

I felt so strongly for these characters, and went through each harrowing decision Jenny had to make, standing right by her side.

VERY well done, Gina Holmes!
I've recommended it highly!

(This review is done for my own growth and experience as an aspiring author.)

I, She, Which One?

I recently finished my first draft of my first acutal complete manuscript!
There are tons of kinks to work out still. 
But while I'm taking a breather, my new work in progress is...confusing.

I was looking at my new WIP, and was boggled at the long process that lies ahead.
I'm thinking of changing the point of view, and I'm not even past chapter 10! (short chapters)
I've heard that most romances are in 3rd person, which btw, I just read one in first, and LOVED it!

So anyway, it's in third POV, and I find myself having to edit when I pop back into first person POV.

What are your favorite points of view?
Do you have a standard?


Is this how we find our voice?  If so, what's yours?

Tuesday, June 8, 2010

Balking My Own System

Each morning at 5am, I'm up with the daunting, life-sucking, sleep-deprevating sound of my shrill alarm clock...ugh.
Most of the time, I'm up at the sound of it, trying to shut the annoying thing off before my family hears and yells at me.
But yesterday morning, my husband had to shake me awake.  I still got up to write, but the whole day, I was so d-r-a-i-n-e-d!
So this morning, I went against my own rule!
I changed the alarm time, and went back to bed for another hour.
I took a day off of writing, and I thought I'd feel terrible, but fortunately, I feel refreshed!
Today, I woke up a little sleepy still, but nothing like yesterday!
I feel great today!

Q4u:
What is your schedule?  Have you ever broken your system?  If so, how did you feel about it?

Saturday, June 5, 2010

Character Emotion

A few weeks ago, I read a blog about the author getting emotiaonal over their character.

I have to say, I've felt sad at my character's situation, but not until today, my very first ever "nothing but writing" day (I'm on my lunch break lol), have I really experienced my character's emotions.

The first chapter (short backstory) made me cry like a baby!

I was so sad for my character, but thrilled to be feeling such emotion for her!
It was a strange range of emotions! 
But I was very thankful for them.
I've already conencted with my character, I hope it will continue throughout the story, and that she will connect with the readers.

What I did differently than before:
1. character worksheet. 
   -I completed an in depth evaluation sheet of the person: eye color, skills, etc.
2. I have been dwelling on this story for months in the background.
   -A friend of mine came up with the original idea, and we've been tweaking this for quite some time.

I had to share that good news!

What are some milestones you've accomplished in your writing, insignificant or significant?

Tuesday, June 1, 2010

My connection

I've always looked at writing as an outlet, or even as a connection to human lives everwhere; it's all interwoven, our lives and the written word.

I've seen how God can use the written word to get His message accross, and I'm thrilled when He chooses to use me.

Let me rewind.  Sunday, we had a get together of sorts at a sister church.  People performed songs from our church and from theirs.  I signed "Hold My Heart" by Tenth Avenue North.  WOW!  What an incredible song!  SOOO powerful!  (And really active, it's a fun one.)

Well, each time I sign that song, I am connected to God through it, and although I'm performing the signs in front of people, I mostly feel God speaking through me, but in the background of that, I can sense God and me communicating! (I can't help but think that Tenth Avenue North's prayers have come about as well, having touched people with that song.  God spoke through them, and now their song is speaking through others)

That's incredible to me!

Sure, I want Him to use me, I want people to hear what He wants to say through me, but I've completely been naive to the fact that God can BE WITH ME as He USES ME! 

In my writing, I've always felt as though I communicate through it, and God does the same. But, I've never really grasped the fact that God and ME can have moments together as I write. Just me, and God as He uses my fingers to punch the keys.

This can be another form of worship for me and God.  I'm so excited to write tomorrow morning :D

Can you imagine?!
God speaking through me, and to me with words to you!
Cool, eh?

Let's go on an adventure!  God, me, my characters and you!

Tuesday, May 25, 2010

Fresh Eyes Goggles

After I'd sent my first ten pages to my beta readers, I looked back to see what my manuscript looked like.
Had I sent them good stuff?
I was ready to be amazed, but got something much different!
Upon looking back into my words, I saw MANY things that I'd not seen before.
I saw the BORING backstory that I H-A-T-E with a passion!  (So much so that I put down a Danielle Steele novel over it.)
The first button I hit? DELETE...without looking back, baby.

I've heard it said that you should look at something with fresh eyes, and I didn't really understand that till I took myself out of the story, and really read the words.

Upon receiving the critique from my betas, I learned from "new eyes goggles" that the scene I deleted seemed like a breakup scene-it wasn't (it introduced one of the MC's! :o()
The other beta said she thought it was a continuation (a scene happening outside of the MC that had already been moved away from)-UGH!
I emailed the ten pages to her, and appologized profusely for the second scene.


What techniques are best to get your "fresh eyes goggles" on?

Monday, May 24, 2010

Affirmation

Just recently, I posted a blog about being afraid I wasn't good enough.
Well, I had a friend beta read my first 10 pages, and SHE GOT SICK!
HA!
Her and her husband were ordering food, and she felt nauseated! (NO not because the pages were bad, because the character had just found her husband cheating, and was really upset!)
I can't explain to you the feelings I had when I realized she connected with my character :p
I've been so afraid and worried that I wasn't good enough at showing (not telling) people what they were doing and seeing.
As nervous as I was to show someone else my 'baby', it paid off.

I'm so thankful that God's working through me and teaching me so many things about people, and giving me stories to tell.

Please pray for me as I jump into edits, like BIG edits!
Even to the point of changing my point of view and one of the characters' personality traits.
So, please keep me in your prayers.
Thanks SO SO  SO much to my dear friend for helping me!

Thursday, May 20, 2010

What's it to ya?

It occured to me the other day, as I was ashamed to raise my hands in a praise song (shallow?  I felt as though I was), that I didn't really want to draw attention to myself, and I still feel that way. 

Please, if you have another opinion, share it with me!  I'm really sad that I can't just raise my hands in praise for fear of drawing attention to myself (I don't feel that way when other people do it, but I feel that way about myself)!

Instead, I bow my head and pray as I'm praising, or make an 'audience of one' for myself instead of showing outwardly what's going on  inside.  ( I DO NOT feel this way about other people!  Just sayin' this is how I feel deep inside) 

But then I heard it said today in a lesson by Pete Briscoe that if you worship outwardly, your spirit follows.  As I've felt lately, if I worship inwardly, outward worship is a reflection...but I'm thoroughly confused now. lol

But then I thought about the things I do on a daily basis.
I don't curse, I don't smoke, I don't drink.
If I lie, I feel terrible and have to spill about the truth quickly or I'll be eaten up with regret and guilt.
If I see something not right, morally, (i.e. hiding evidence while something's going on in the background with the police and we're assumed innocent) I can't stand it, and WILL walk away...

And then I get the looks and comments of:  "Goody two-shoes"  and "Holier than thou" attitudes.

WHAT'S IT TO YA!?
Who said I was doing it for you?!


I'm staying morally strong for in my relationship with GOD!
I don't want to feel that guilt, that gut-twisting, heart-palpitating, uncomfortable guilt!
I kinda wanna stay away from it!  And I want my relationship with God to stay clean,  not rocky.


But why can't I feel as though that's what's going on with my worship?  Why can' t I block out the attention I'd be getting, (which I know, if someone lifts up their hands in worhsip, I look and then turn away cause I KNOW it's between them and God!  Why I think it's different, I'll never know!)
Am I being shallow?  Is this just how I worship?  Maybe so.  This hurts to say, but am I focusing on 'them' instead of God?
What's your thoughts?

Sorry for the rant, but I'm a little peeved about it right now.  No particular reason except that I'm just confued I suppose.

Saturday, May 15, 2010

Time to Re-write!

Ever since I was a kid, I've loved to write.
But honestly, I've never really finished a story.  It all became too hard. BUT!!!
I FINISHED THE ONE I'VE BEEN WORKING ON!! Finally.  I've had so much trouble finishing this manuscript, mostly because I've actually never finished one, I suppose.

However, everything felt a little dry, and it was, but now it time to fix it!
I've heard it said that you don't write a book, you rewrite it.
And, that you can't fix a blank page.
It's true, lol
I've begun the revision process, and I'm only on page 2!  I see LOTS AND LOTS of things to change.
Things that will make it much, much better, and lead the story where I want it go go a little more smoothly.

To the people who prompted me to stick it out: Thanks.
I really appreciate your help.
I see now what you were talking about.  Get the story down, then get to rewriting.
Without you, this would have been another unfinished piece.


If I'm really honest, this isn't my best work.  Lord willing, if I can finish this one, I can finish the next one!

Tuesday, May 11, 2010

What if I'm not good enough?

Sometimes I feel as though I'm not good enough for writing.
Then again, I go back to what I heard Lori Wilde say in one of her lessons on Ed2go.com.
To pretty much sum it up, she said it's not all about talent, you've gotta have commitment and drive.

I love to write, there's no question about that!
But, last night as I was laying my head down to sleep, I wondered, What if this never happens and I'm wasting my time?
I had that gut-kicking, sinking feeling inside the pit of my stomach.
No!  I thought.  I refuse to believe that!  I love this way too much for it to be a hobby!
Is that determination coming out?  Or is that stubbornness?
I mean...what if I'm never published?


There's some GREAT books out there!  That's my cometition!  Those books are also, ironically, my text books, my lessons and research. 

What if my writing is too stale?
What if it's never going to improve no matter how much I try to make it better?


I read a book lately by Danielle Steele, okay, so I read like the first chapter before I threw it into the yardsale stuff.
I coudln't stand her first 30 or more pages.  It was all boring backstory..and I mean BORING backstory, and I never could get out of the annoyed attitude.
Mark one book down for the 'no' list.

What if my writing is that boring?
I only picked up the book cause I like DS and I liked the cover and blurb....
What if that's as far as my story goes?
No one is going to pick up a book by some random person and read something after the first few pages that is too boring!

Nevermind the public for heavens sake!  What about an agent?!

Maaaaaan!
I'm so frustrated.
But there's one thing for sure...
These feelings will NEVER keep me from writing.

Thursday, May 6, 2010

How do you focus?

I find it extremely hard to focus on all my tasks at work without letting my characters creep back in the forefront!
The kids and the hubbs are great.  I love vegging out with them, and being with them.

But when it comes to work...it seems as though I'll be staring at the computer wondering what my charachters will do next, trying to imagine them speaking to me, I pray hard for God to show me where they should go. It's almost like I've entered a world, and when I have to think, and don't feel like doing somthing, my mind reverts back to my word-filled laptop screen, instead of the fincnace program I'm supposed to be UTILIZING at WORK where I get PAID!!!!

I feel like I'm so close to something!  I feel God pulling me toward something and if I can juuuust close my eyes and listen for just a few minutes....Wait, what am I doing again?  Where was I?  Oh right, work...here we go...
Five minutes later, it's the same thing!

I'll have to shake myself out of my thoughts and refocus on what I'm supposd to be doing! 


How do you keep the job from interfering with the JOB?
Help, help, help!
Am I just lazy?  Do I find more pleasure in writing?  OF COURSE!
But maybe I need to really focus on what's important at the time and really get into it just because I should do all things as if working for the Lord, since, ya know?  As a Christian, that's EXACTLY what I'm doing.

So how do you do it?

Tuesday, May 4, 2010

American Cancer Society

A very dear, sweet, amazing friend of mine passed away this morning from cancer.

She's battled it for quite some time, but just recently, things went down.
A terrible spiral to watch.
 
A few months ago, my cousin and I went through the Couch to 5K running program in hopes to finish a 5k.
There was no charities to run for, so we joined the Relay for Life in our county. 
Our inspiration, each time we thought we couldn't continue was "Wanda, Wanda Wanda"  Over and over.
My cousin, Ali's friend Holly, the picture of health (has ran several races and triathalons of her own) has cancer, we prayed/used her as our inspiration too. 
Each time our legs burned, ached or even when we felt as though we coudn't make it, or take another step, we rememebered why we did it.

Our reason for Relay was Holly and Wanda.
Wanda is in a much better place now, but we'll miss her terribly.

"The world's a lot dimmer since she's gone, but Heaven's a lot brighter"-Ali

Please pray for her family.  She mothered her granddaughter, and now she's gone. 
Pray especially for this young teenager who needs !!NEEDS!! God's guidance.
Pray for us as her youth leaders as well.
Thank you

The American Cancer Society.
They are working hard to find a cure.
Please support them in their endeavors. 
Support millions of peole with cancer and their loved ones.
Please go to http://www.cancer.org/ and donate to the cause.
Thank you for your support

Thursday, April 29, 2010

Can He even hear me?!

In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groans that words cannot express. 27And he who searches our hearts knows the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for the saints in accordance with God's will. Romans 8:26



Read that again….


If you’re like me, this verse has been hiding in the Bible for as long as I’ve been able to read! I’ve never seen this verse before, and lately, I’ve read or heard it more than once.


I get the same chill down my spine and pep in my step each time I hear it.


However, the logical side of me wonders what’s coming.


Have you ever just wondered from where the next trial will come? What will it be? Who will it be? Why? When? You’re not alone, that’s for sure.


A friend of mine posed the question: “How do we prepare?”


So how do we?


I think back to when I was a kid, every question like that could be answered with: Pray, and Read your Bible.


That’s it! That’s the right answer again!  In his book, Every Day with Jesus; The Full Armor of God, Selwyn Hughes says this:


“As I have been saying, the spiritual application of the helmet of salvation is not so much the enjoyment of our present salvation (though it includes that) as it is the assurance that a sure salvation is coming-and is even now at work”


God does work out our lives according to His purpose!  But what if that plan includes us or someone we love suffers from depression, drug addiction, affairs, child loss?


What about then?


Those prayers where all you do is sit in the presence of God and cry? Those utterances of your heart, God hears those.


How?


It’s heard through the Spirit that’s in us. I recall in the Purpose Driven Life by Rick Warren, that he mentioned that God isn’t a God that is sitting back waiting for our sacrifice and a job well done. He’s with us, in us, and hurting with the ones He loves.


Those times when all you can do is take one last step, one last word, even if you can’t get that far, He hears that ache, that groan, that whisper of His name.


I’ve had such confusing times and painful moments in my life (as we all have) and sometimes I could only look up to the dark sky and hold my hands out, or fists, and say ‘why?’…okay, so it was more like…”WHY?!”


I had no idea how to pray, or how to respond!


He heard that. But most important, He heard the uttering in my heart below the confused and angry surface. He heard me. And the best part, just as one best friend to another, there were no words needed.


Get to your Bible. Prepare for that hardship. Draw close to Him. Prepare for that next hurdle. Focus on His Words to us, soak them in and learn from them. Brand them to the fabric of your heart. And next time Satan comes around, throwing darts, you’ve got that hope of Salvation.


You’ve got the hope that God WILL come through in the end. And he’s going to be with you in that circumstance, and He’s going to be fighting with you, and picking you up, even if it’s to hide you away while He continues fighting! There’s no doubt, you’ll be safe. And the best part is you’ll be heard. Because He hears exactly what your mouth can’t say.






Remember Him today, and thank Him for what He’s already done for you. Thank Him for what He’s already worked out, and heard from the ‘bottom of your heart’.

Wednesday, April 28, 2010

Monotony

I came to realize, as I was reading through my current writing piece that I throw a lot of what I've lived in with the ideas and characters.
I know we're supposed to write what we know, and I know what I know, however, I'm worried this monotonous cycle of stories will always present themselves in my work.
I've read several authors and their characters seem to be the same person throughout their books.  These are not amateur writers I'm talking about, these are mainstream, VERY well known authors.
I know there's a certain voice that every author has, but how can these professional writers get away with the monotony?
Are they allowed just because they are professionals, and they know the character archetype is the right for the story?

How do I pop out of my own box?
How do I come out of who I am as a person, and learn other people?

How do you do it?
-people watching?
-eavesdropping on conversations?
-study of other writers?

Tuesday, April 27, 2010

Stepping Out Time

It's finally that time.
I've been inspired by a dear friend of mine who is also a writer.
She has suggested I start reading these blogs by writers and literary agents. Get out of the box, so to speak. To read outside of what books are on my shelf.

Well, I took her advice that she took from those who have been teaching her, and now I'm getting myself out there.


Question for you:
When have you ever stepped out and done something like this...I'm not talking about starting a blog, I'm talking about doing what you've always wanted, started that very first step toward what you've dreamed?